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November 14, 2020

There are many levels of painful emotions.  As many levels as the circumstances around our relationships with our adult children.  There is no cookie cutter fix for this complex issue.  Some people are in severe pain and have difficulty functioning in their daily lives.  Others are ready to start living their lives again, but they just don’t know how to do it.  So how do we know when we would benefit from coaching or when we need therapy? 

If we are unable to function in our daily lives, we should seek out a professional therapist.  This is a normal human experience that many people find themselves in and out of in their lifetime.  It’s important to ask the question; are we able to get out of our beds, effectively do our work, eat right and sleep?  These are some of the basic functions that we should be able to do daily.  If you are not able to perform these basic functions, have unresolved trauma or often feel or fantasize about harming yourself, please call your trusted family physician or a therapist.  If you are in immediate danger, please call 911 or the suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255.  You matter!

There are many parents in the world that struggle with their relationships with an adult child or children.  It can be a temporary struggle, a recurring circumstance, or a more long-term experience. They may feel painful emotions but are still able to perform basic functions in their lives.  They often feel hurt, angry, or disrespected and have the desire to feel like themselves again.  They might have a lot of negative emotions that ruminate in their minds.  Maybe they react to these negative emotions with angry words or self-judgment, which ultimately produce more negative thoughts and rarely give them the life results they want.  Life coaches have the tools to help you manage this.  We can help you examine these thoughts and then you can decide what is working in your life and what is not working.  Coaches teach you the tools that provide you with the opportunity to be in a relationship with others and yourself that work best for you. 

Therapy and Coaching often complement one another.  Some therapists have both therapy practices and coaching practices as they recognize the difference.  Therapy can help you resolve your past trauma and get to that baseline of living a functional life again.  Coaching can help you recognize the patterns of negative emotions and move forward to a better life, relationships and achieving your goals.  In both cases, I would recommend that you find a person that works for you and is trained in their profession.   

Start with where you are at.  Both therapy and coaching are great avenues for healing and teaching clients how to process emotions and start feeling complete worthiness again.  There is no shame in using all the resources available to begin and continue that process.  If you are still uncertain what would best meet your current needs and desires, please feel free to make an appointment for a 30-minute consultation.